Gerda Richmond

Gerda Richmond

Born in Dresden Germany on 8/23/1934

Father - Fritz Berger; Mother - Gertrude Berger; Brothers - Henry and Hans

Mom told my brother and I many stories about Germany, but I loved hearing about the good times before WWll.  She told stories about adventures along the Elbe River and the pungent smells of lilac bushes. She spoke about Weihnachts (Christmas) and the tradition of decorating the Christmas tree with delicious cookies and beautiful lit candles.  She told stories about baking stollen in the communal bakeries, lighting the pyramid and opening the gifts on Christmas Eve.  We will continue the traditions that we enjoyed doing with mom during the holiday and dearly miss the competition that she brought to baking stollen.  Or, perhaps the girls and I will continue that tradition also. ;) 

Mom was only eleven years old during WWll and endured the hardship, fear, and sadness of the war and survived the final assault on Germany, which was the destruction of Dresden.  By this time her mom, her younger brother and herself decided to stop running down to the bomb shelter and instead stood on the balcony of her apartment building as they watched in horror as their beautiful city was destroyed. Her father decided to not return to her family after the war so searching and working for food was a job done by her mom, her older brother and herself. Starvation was always near, but through tenacity, creativity, and strong will, mom and her family survived. 

After years of helping her family survive the pain and hardship of the war, she followed her dreams of something better and escaped East Germany in 1957. She stayed in West Germany for a few years but in 1961 with the help of a sponsor she took on the adventure of her lifetime and sailed to the United States on a cargo ship. After three long weeks of sailing, Mom arrived in Norfolk, Virginia.  She did not want to stay with her sponsor, so she was on her own again. Fortunately, she met a wonderful lady who helped her find a place to stay and a job.  The need to move again resulted in mom traveling West to San Diego, CA in 1963. She always wanted a family of her own so when she married my father she became a mother to his two kids, Mark and Russel and then grew the family with my older brother Jim and myself. Being married to my father started out fine but it did not take long for their marriage to be another difficult time for my mom. After the divorce, she was left to take care of Jim and I on her own with once again few resources and no money. She worked hard to achieve her GED but after being a stay home mom, finding a job was tough.  My father did not help with child support, so mom struggled to provide for Jim and I but she managed to find various jobs and provided us with a good life.  I remember mom continuously practicing to improve her typing and being so proud of herself when she was hired at United Way as an administrative assistant.  Mom felt so accomplished to have that job where she earned a good living and made some great friends.  

After mom retired from United Way in 1999, she was not done working.  She then became a nanny, which was a job that she loved. The kids that mom cared for were so important to her and they all gave her such great joy. Mom fully retired at 87 when driving long distances became too difficult. 

My husband, Brian, and I moved to Arizona to begin our lives together in 1990 and when we moved into our current home in 1999, mom moved to Arizona and bought the townhome that we outgrew. Mom missed San Diego but enjoyed being closer to family and eventually grew fond of Arizona. When we made mom a grandmother, she was so happy, and she loved her grandkids tremendously.  She liked teaching them life skills, sharing stories, or making them delicious treats.  Mom had her struggles with tough memories or sadness, but family brought her joy and a feeling of great success. 

Brian brought Brittany to our marriage and he and I gave mom Megan and Paige. I am so glad that mom was able to see Megan and Michael get married last year and she was thrilled that Paige and Dillan married in February of this year. Jim and Sherry gave mom Seth, Abby, Gracie and Eli and it was hard having them so far away but she did her best to keep up with their life events and to let them know that she loved them. 

My relationship with mom was oftentimes complicated.  We loved each other very much but we both had determined minds that were not always in agreement. The mother and daughter relationship is complicated but even with rough edges we always made our way back to each other.  Mom lived on her own until she was 89 and after her first stroke we had a routine of her texting me in the morning to let me know that she was ok. We would also chat on the phone when I drove home from the office.  These routines and moments of connection were the things that kept us close.  The struggles that we had when I was younger smoothed out and we found ways to keep our conversations light and positive. After the second stroke, life for mom changed dramatically.  She could no longer live on her own and she moved in with Brian and I.  We wanted this arrangement to work so badly, but mom battled intense anxiety and dementia and Brian and I realized that life was complicated for mom and we were in over our heads. 

After looking into many senior homes, we found Brookdale.  The move was tough at first but soon mom made friends, participated in activities and enjoyed meals with the residents.  I visited her multiple times a week and often joked that I never knew what to expect when I arrived.  I may get diverted with a friend of mom’s who needed help with their television, or had a question, or needed something lifted.  I was happy to help and be the hero of the moment.  In mom’s last days, I felt so much love for mom from the facility caregivers, hospice caregivers, and her friends at Brookdale.  I am truly thankful to all of the people who cared and loved my mom. 

Mom meant so much to so many people.  She was a co-worker, friend, daughter, sister, grandmother, and for me her most important role was my mom.  I miss her dearly, but I will be ok because she made me strong, and I thank her for that.  I love you, Mom. 

To view Gerda's Tribute Video, Click Here: Gerda Richmond - Tribute Video