Helen Grosse-Rhode

Born Helen Scott, our mother was the great granddaughter of pioneers Benjamin and Martha Welbaum. Together, Ben, from Ohio and Martha from Virginia moved to Indiana leaving in 1888 to farmstead in nearby Wayne Nebraska. Most of their descendants remained in Nebraska. Helen’s mother, Fredda Mae Williams moved to Omaha where she met Clyde Wesley Scott with whom she had Helen and another daughter, Marion. In 1941, at nineteen, Helen met and married Norbert Grosse-Rhode from Dodge Nebraska. In the years spanning 1942 through 1958 they raised nine children, six daughters and three sons. They spent most of their lives in the Midwest (Nebraska, Minnesota, Iowa, and Kansas) eventually settling in Colorado. Beautiful, poised and unassuming, with loving dedication and commitment, she mastered every aspect of motherhood and homemaking, her chosen vocation. Taught by her maternal grandmother Carrie, our mother was so adapt at sewing she could fashion clothing as well as any seamstress. Also talented in the creative arts of embroidering, knitting and crocheting she took great pleasure in an avocation she endeavored to share with all six of her daughters. Thrifty, resourceful, levelheaded, she managed to adjust any difficult situation to, if not to an amiable conclusion then at least an impartial one. Steadfast and unwavering she was our moral compass. A matchless woman of integrity. “Mom, you will be profoundly missed but forever mother, in our hearts”. She was an active church member who was beloved by all. Many of her closest friendships were among her congregation. Ninety years of age, Helen died peacefully at the Porter Hospice after complications from surgery. She requested that her ashes be buried in Wayne Nebraska along with her mother and the Welbaum linage. She is survived not only by her 9 children but also 19 grandchildren and 14 great grandchildren. The following is a brief memorial from Helen’s children; excerpts from letters written to our mother celebrating her 80th birthday. A tribute to “the perfect woman and mother of her era”. “Dear Mom, I want to tell you how very much I love you for being my Mom and for the special things you have done for me: for giving me my very existence, for the tender direction and fond memories. You were always there to pick me up, catch me when I fell, to scold, to hold and to protect me, to give me guidance and confidence thorough out my life. I will never forget how important you have been in shaping my practical forward-looking view on life. I am forever grateful. Thank you. Your loving son, Stephen”. “Dear Mother, you are special to me. You set an example of doing what was right, good and kind. You did all a mother’s tasks and most importantly, you loved me just for being Shirley. You praised me, pointed out my faults, helped me to improve my character and supported me in difficult times. You were loving in your concern for me, right in the demands you made of me, persistent in requiring that I be a good person, generous in your care for me and courageous in your example of strength during adversity. You counseled me when I needed advice and never interfered in my choices. You provided me the daily gift of your love and the security of being cared for by you. To this day, that same atmosphere of your unselfish love and genuine caring exists whenever I am with you. Mother, you will live fondly and vibrantly in my memory forever. All my love, your daughter Shirley”. “Mom, here I sit, the cursor blinking, flooded with memories of my life with you. No one’s mother was as pretty as you. You have always seemed unaware of your good looks, remaining naturally unpretentious. Who would have suspected that under such a pleasing, tranquil exterior, there lay unbending determination. Every task completed…every day! Did we ever want for anything? You never demonstrated a lack of energy. I only remember you strong, unstoppable, basically good natured and remarkably uncomplaining. Honestly, I never remember your grumbling about anything you did for us. (And we know those thirty-five years were not entirely non-stop fun either!) You were selfless. From dawn ’til well passed twelve some nights, you were busy with the care and feeding of your nine children and everything in between. For myself I can say that I never felt less than a whole person in the shadow of eight other siblings. I was loved for myself and there was no scale with which we measured ourselves by the other. In your eyes we were equal. Mostly I felt free to explore, to discover myself, to be me. Hard to believe that you were making these adjustments for eight others. There are few mothers who have done their jobs so well. You seemed to have had a never ending well of inner strength that never ran dry even in the harshest realities of life on planet Earth. You never caved mother. I am fortunate to have learned from a true survivor, the meaning of profound commitment to one’s family. You are nothing but remarkable! To thank you for my life, showing me it’s decent side, doesn’t seem enough; it isn’t. I would never pretend that I could come close to emulating the sterling gifts that you have accorded me. If however, I can provide but half of your good hearted sensibilities for my own children, I will consider that I have done my best. I am grateful beyond words to have had you for my mother. You are forever in my heart. All my love, Carolyn”. “Dear Mom, do you remember letting me stay up late to watch Charlie Chan Friday nights on Oliver street? And sitting in front of a bowl of oatmeal, not letting me walk to school until I was finished? And every summer taking us to College Hill for daily swim lessons? Also, while you were on vacation you relayed to us the frightening experience of having a bear came up to your cabin door. So many memories to cherish. While I was growing up I felt surrounded in the comfort of your presence and love. How do I say thank you for all the meals you prepared, carting me to lessons and school activities and too many tasks to recount. The one thing I know is that you provided me a safe, normal and good life for me. Thank you for being my support then and now. You were really an extraordinary person; strong inside and out. And my hope is that you were happy overall and felt your life with us worthwhile. Love from your daughter, Janyce.” “Mother, I have been blessed to have a mother who taught me many things by simply letting me ‘find out’ on my own and yet, not unbridled. By guiding me on my journey with your smile and careful instructions, you always gave me your unselfish nurturing, love and care. And as I continue on this path, I find strength in your examples of faith, compassion and patience. When I reflect on our life together, I find my burden lightened just by thinking of you. Your beautiful smile and the twinkle in your eyes. I am truly lucky to have had you for “my mom.” Love always, Paul.” “Mother, I have endless, wonderful memories of time you spent with me and my other siblings. You always seemed so happy to me. I recall being quite small, maybe 2 or 3 and you sat me on top of a table. You were smiling while you were talking to me as you put a little dress on me…one of my first memories. The day you brought Greg home from the hospital, you laid him down on the bed. Shirley and I were in the hallway and she was telling me that the baby was my new little brother. I looked up at your face while you were tending to Greg. You were smiling so happily that I thought you were the most beautiful women there ever was and I hoped that I would grow up and be so happy and as beautiful as you. Mother, I remember you as being sweet and patient, never yelling or mad. You did for us kids morning till night; cooking, sewing, starching, pressing, bathing, brushing fixing our hair, sleeping with us when we were sick. Yes, you were a very good mother. I probably never told you enough how wonderful and what it’s meant to me. Trust me, there aren’t enough words to convey my feelings. I do have all my memories, constantly and never forgotten. I love you always, Michele.” “Mom, you have always been there. Full of love and caring. You were never pushy or overbearing and instead showed selfless, loving devotion to your kids. The endless meals, cleaning and managing the house, crocheting, sewing and ironing, yet you never wavered from your responsibilities. Some of my favorite memories with you are our Friday night drive-in movies, playing cards (crazy eights) and sharing our favorite treats together…Three Musketeers, hot cocoa and Little Debbies. Chit chatting with you while we rolled our hair and all the fun trips with just we girls. What stands out for me is your sweet disposition, with beauty and elegance to match. Thank you mom for everything and most especially for being YOU and my mom. XOXO Love, Joan.” “Mom, positive values, patience, understanding, selflessness, respect for others and goodness are, to name a few, virtues you taught me by your loving and gentle nurturing. I remember many moments you lovingly shared with me. I hope my son and daughter will be as lucky as me to have had a wonderful guardian and guide through life as I have. I can only try to come close. I have always and will forever cherish the kindness you displayed toward me. You are exceptional beyond words. I will always keep you in my heart. Love, Greg.” “Mother, through all my growing up years you were there for me. How could I not feel safe and secure with you as my mother. Now I am grown and we share the love of Jehovah. I know when the time comes you will be taking care of me still from heaven, for all of eternity. Your goodness will be forever remembered by everyone who has ever known you. Yours is a legacy of love and kindness and devotion to your family. I love you always. Your daughter, Mary Beth.”