10 Ways to Honor a Loved One at Thanksgiving

In the United States, Thanksgiving is a time for gratitude, tradition, and togetherness, but it can also bring a deep ache when someone you love is no longer at the table. Whether your loved one was a parent, partner, child, friend, or chosen family, their absence is felt. If this is your first Thanksgiving without them, you may wonder how to navigate the holiday with grace and grief.

The good news: there’s no “right” way to grieve. And you don’t need to hold back your feelings or pretend everything’s normal. Instead, you can honor their memory in ways that feel true to you and your family, no matter what shape your family takes.

Here are 10 heartfelt ways to honor a loved one at Thanksgiving, with options for kids and adults alike.

1. Remember the First Thanksgiving – and Create Your Own Traditions

The first Thanksgiving was a shared meal between the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag people. It wasn’t just about food but community, survival, and coming together across differences. This spirit of connection still matters today.

You can carry that spirit forward by creating your new traditions. Whether it's lighting a candle, setting a place at the table, or serving their favorite dish, you can blend the old with the new in a way that feels right. Your traditions can vary from year to year as you make your way along your grief journey.

2. Set a Place at the Table

Leaving an empty seat or setting a symbolic place can be a simple but powerful act if it feels right for you. Add a photo, a keepsake, or a plate of your loved one's favorite dish. This invites your loved one’s memory to stay present throughout the meal.

If you have children at the table, this can be a great teaching moment. Let them add a drawing or note to the setting so they feel part of the remembrance. Remember that young children and teens might be new to the feeling of loss and need time to process their grief.

3. Share Stories or Toasts

Go around the table and ask everyone to share a memory, a funny story, or something your loved one used to say. If toasts feel more comfortable, raise a glass in their honor before the meal.

Encouraging younger guests to join in can help them process grief, too. Let them draw a picture or say something simple like “I miss Grandma’s hugs.”

4. Cook Their Signature Dish

Did your loved one make the world’s best stuffing? Were they known for a particular pie? Recreating their recipe is a delicious way to keep them close. Inviting others to help cook or taste-test turns the memory into a shared experience.

Younger family members can join in mixing, stirring, or helping set the table with place cards honoring the dish's origin.

5. Create a Gratitude Jar or Tablecloth

Start a new tradition by writing what you’re thankful for on slips of paper or directly on a fabric tablecloth. Include messages of thanks for the time you had with your loved one.

Ask kids to decorate the jar or cloth with stickers, handprints, or drawings — it will become a keepsake you can revisit every year.

Gratitude is a powerful tool while navigating grief.

6. Do Something They Loved

Was your loved one an early riser who watched the Macy’s Thanksgiving parade? Did they always sneak an extra roll to the dog? Repeating one of their simple rituals can spark connection and smiles.

Don’t feel you need to “perform” grief. Sometimes, these tiny, authentic acts are the most powerful.

7. Volunteer or Donate in Their Name

Giving back is in the spirit of Thanksgiving. Whether you donate food, serve a meal, or contribute to a cause they cared about, these acts can give your grief purpose.

Let children help pick a toy or canned good to donate. It can be empowering for them to do something kind in memory of someone they miss.

8. Take a Walk Down Memory Lane

Look through old photo albums or home videos. You could create a slideshow to play during dessert. Sharing these memories allows laughter and tears to coexist, just as they should.

Let children point out silly outfits or ask questions. It’s OKif emotions bubble up; it shows how much they matter.

9. Write Them a Letter

Sometimes, the words we can’t say out loud still need to be said. Take a moment to write a note to your loved one during the day. You can keep it, burn it in a symbolic fire, or place it in a memory box. Need a few tips to get started? Read our article on letter writing and download the free guide. 

Younger guests might enjoy drawing a picture or writing what they’d say if they could call them on the phone.

10. Permit Yourself to Feel Your Feelings

Thanksgiving doesn't have to be perfect. It’s OK to cry during the meal, take a quiet moment alone, or even skip certain traditions this year. Grief doesn’t follow a script or a timeline, nor should you.

Let the people around you know how you’re feeling, and let them help carry the day. You don’t have to do it alone.

Final Thought: Make the Day Your Own

Thanksgiving without a loved one may always feel different, but it can still be meaningful. Whether you're celebrating with a big family, a close circle of friends, or simply yourself, it’s OK to honor grief and gratitude side by side.

Remember, love doesn’t end with loss. How you choose to remember someone, whether big or small, can offer warmth and healing for everyone at the table.

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